The Stories Children Tell. . .

Oh, the morning trips to school. They usually produce quite the interesting stories. Mostly from Grant. Tate does pop up now and then with some interesting stuff, but Grant is the talker and he tells such detailed stories. Here is what was said this morning:

Grant: "Do you want to know what I did yesterday?"

Tate and Ayden: "What?" and "Uh huh."

G: "I rode C.C. all by myself!"

T and A (no snickers about T and A, I didn't plan that!): "Oh!"

G: "And my penis kept tickling when she was trotting! Isn't that so silly?" (It was really hard to keep a straight face at this point, but I didn't want to interrupt the story.)

T: "Oh."

G: "You want to know what the silliest thing was?"

T: "Mmmm."

G: "We were riding around the paths and the trees kept falling down and my mom didn't know how to get out." (Where exactly do you take him riding, Holley? The forest of doom??? ;) ;)

T: "Mmmm."

G: "Isn't that the silliest?"

T: "Uh huh!"

While this conversation is going on I am transported back to my teaching days, and all the teachers out there will totally understand. There are just some kids who are talkers, not necessarily those who are always talking during class (although there are enough of those!), but those kids who tell stories. Very detailed and descriptive stories about what goes on in their house, what their parents say and do, what their siblings say and do, even what THEY say and do. For example:

I subbed in a second grade class where one little girl came up to me and started describing (in horrible, disgusting detail) about how her cats always went to the bathroom on one spot on their dining room floor. These cats went there SO much that apparently they had mushrooms growing out of their carpet. Not kidding, mushrooms. I felt a little scarred for life after this conversation, but not more than the next example I'm going to give you.

When I taught fourth grade one of the students decided to bring in his parents porn for show-and-tell. His parents had thought they had hidden it well, but not well enough. Think about how those parents must have felt because they had to pick these magazines up in the PRINCIPAL'S office after school. As for myself, it was a little hard to look these parents in the face after finding out they liked Big Busted Babes.

So, like I said, other teachers understand, as for you parents out there: be warned.